For whatever reason, I've been semi-absent from blogging. And it's not that I don't have the time--I just haven't really been in the mood to write, which is so, so weird for me. Nothing gives me more pleasure than sharing the trials and triumphs of international living with all of you. I've just been sort of 'meh' lately.
I guess I'm in some sort of emo funk. Not full out emo, mind you. Just sort of emo. The weather this past week hasn't been fantastic (with the exception of that very strange day when there were no clouds and it was almost 80 degrees, preceding a day that was pouring rain and only 50) so I've been hanging out in my room a lot, which is exactly the sort of thing I wanted to avoid while being here. But being in class for so long is so draining, and most of the time all I want to do is come back here and wind down. Sometimes I have a glass of wine or a beer. It's good to just let everything from the day seep away.
I think I just need to kick my own ass. I think we all are that way. Funks happen. I don't care who you are or what you do--everyone hits that slump where they're just like "FML." I know, I know. You're probably thinking "Sarah, shut the fuck up. You're living in Germany." Right? But I'll tell something to those of you that have never LIVED in another country where people don't speak the same language--it is rough. Traveling is one thing--actually living here? Entirely different. Things you are very used to, like cars and Costco and signs in English are all absent, and it makes adjusting to a new life considerably more difficult. And Germany is pretty tough. I don't want to say all the people are like this, but for the most part, it is not a friendly place. Maybe I'm biased because I live in Boise and everyone is pretty cordial, but people here are very self-sufficient and independent, and so they don't really rely on other people for happiness. So things like smiling at random people on the street just doesn't happen. It's probably why I almost cry when someone is pleasant to me in a store or walking past me. But dammit all, I still smile at everyone. I also miss my friends. A lot. It is very strange going from being able to see people whenever I wanted to only being able to email them or skype with them. I have to call Vickie sometimes just to hear her voice. It certainly makes me want to come back to Boise and never leave. I never thought I'd say that. Hmph. Maybe absence does make the heart grow fonder....
Classes are going all right. I need to be more proactive about reviewing the materials when I get home. I've been reading lots of children's books, which has helped considerably (yay for library cards) and trying to learn new verbs and phrases, but German is an incredibly difficult language. Some things are similar to English but for the most part, it is not like learning Spanish or French. I'm basically starting from square one and working my way up. Sentence structure is at least making a little more sense. I'm going to be really happy when I can actually start talking to people. Because presently, I talk a lot with my hands. I'm sure waiters love when I ask for a check by making a square with my hands. Yeah, THAT makes sense.
The good news: classes are starting soon. Like REAL, actual university classes. Which means I get to start boxing and yoga. I miss having exercise classes, and I think boxing is just what I need to get out some of this pent up aggression I've been storing.
And there is a two week break coming up. Due to the hightened security risk in Europe right now
(for those of you who don't know, France recently outlawed the burqa, or more specifically, anything that fully covers one's face. Which, of course, led to a hostile reaction from the Muslim community. So last night I received an email from the international programs adviser at Boise State warning against traveling to heavy tourists areas)
I am trying to figure out what I want to do. I was hoping to go to the Basque country, but I would have to fly out of Paris for cheap flights, and currently Paris has a giant freaking bulls-eye planted right on the center of it. So I may be staying in Germany. Or I may go check out Vienna. We'll see how I am feeling. I mean, it's two weeks. I cannot stay here. I would be so freaking bored, I wouldn't even know what to do with myself.
So that's about all the update I have. I'm going to try actually blogging more than once a week, but I'd prefer not to be all "meh" wen I do it. :)