Thursday, January 27, 2011

so you want to watch American television...

Oh, you, yes, you there! Living in Germany! You want to watch American television you say? Like, real, actual American television not dubbed in German? CURRENT American television? Like season 6 of "Bones" on Fox? Or the new season of "Greek" on ABC Family? Perhaps you are interested in watching a movie on Netflix instant streaming? Or catching up on "30 Rock" on Hulu? Amazon on demand? Well...

Ha, ha! Fuck you! You do not live in America! You live outside of this great country! You must watch last the last season of "Bones," dubbed over in German! Oh, you think you can outsmart itunes and pretend to be living in the states? Itunes knows. Itunes knows! detects that you are not currently in one of the 50 United States. Hulu says "Germany? Where the fuck is Germany???" Netflix will let you make changes to your account, but don't count on watching the 200 movies you have stored in your instant queue.

I feel like my very livelihood is cut off! The first thing I do when I move back home: call Cableone, have my internet and cable set back up, order a pizza from Guidos, stock up on bottles of New Age wine, and not leave the couch in my living room for 72 hours straight, catching up on all the television I have missed while being over here. No more Charlie Sheen in that fucking horrible "Two and a Half Men." No more listening to the German version of Kyra Sedgwick in "The Closer." I am talking real, honest-to-God, fucking amazing American television. Oh Emily Deschanel, how I have missed thee!

1 comment:

  1. I have a solution!!! have you tried ? You can watch streaming episodes and they aren't just moves. The only thing you have to do is click on the ones with "megavideo" so that you don't have to download any lame player or anything.

    There is also this site: just beware there is a 72h time limit. Easy to reach! hahah. Enjoy. You're welcome ;)