life in a nutshell

Yesterday I got back from the Basque Country (in northern Spain, in case your geography is a bit rusty) smelling of ocean (and unwashed hair) and it has to be said, I had an amazing time. I got a lovely "German" tan, saw old friends, ate great food, and drank fantastic drinks. It was a much needed break after my whirlwind of an emotional week--finishing the play, finishing school, passing my test (HELLS YES) and packing up all my stuff. I am STILL having trouble processing the fact that I will be home in 24 days.

One of the things I have to do when I get home is find a job. I have been looking for basically anything at this point that is part-time, does not require a lot of thought process and gives me a decent paycheck. Of course, I have been looking at law firms for odd jobs they may have, but also with accounting firms, coffee shops, etc.

Last night, something very strange happened. I found a law firm hiring a runner (which is the best job ever, simply because you are not trapped at a desk all day), and even though the pay is not fantastic, it is a job. I realized, though, that this law firm employs one of my former high school classmates...as a lawyer. And I was suddenly met with this overwhelming feeling of underachievement. Here I was, applying for a job as a runner, and this girl had already graduated law school and was gainfully employed. We both graduated with roughly the same grades, same extracurriculars, went to similarly stacked colleges, and yet somewhere along the line, she went to law school and I did not. I started to panic thinking about how perhaps I have been wasting my time and not buckling down and becoming an adult. What the hell am I doing with my life??

Luckily, freaked out Sarah was replaced by "put things in perspective" Sarah. And I realized that yeah, okay, she may be a lawyer and have a job and all of that, but life is more than just a job. Why are we all so defined by what we do for a living? Or defined by what we have not accomplished? Like not being married or not having kids or a career. Why does any of that matter? Life is made up of experiences! I have lived, dammit! So I started making a list of 15 things in my life that I have done that are unique experiences for me, which define me and make me the person I am. Things I have accomplished. And I encourage everyone to do the same. Whenever you start feeling like your accomplishments are not enough, start making a list of things you HAVE done. I can guarantee it is a lot longer than the list of things you haven't. So here I go:

1. I graduated college (twice in December).
2. I lived in another country for a year.
3. I have run 8 half marathons in 4 different countries.
4. I sunburned my boobies on a nude beach in Spain.
5. I have gone snorkeling in the Caribbean.
6. I have gone horseback riding through the rain forest in Panama.
7. I celebrated Canada Day with Canadians in Canada.
8. I got drunk at Octoberfest.
9. I have ordered a beer in 10 different countries.
10. I acted in a play.
11. I have been sea kayaking in Malibu.
12. I worked at the Magic Kingdom in Florida.
13. I have done questionable things in Humboldt County.
14. I drank an Irish man under the table. An Australian later drank me under the table.
15. I have the most amazing friends in the world.