Friday, August 19, 2011

The Readjustment Process

I have now officially been home for two days, and to be honest, Germany feels like a distant memory. I often have moments, where I am sitting in my living room or unpacking or running errands all over town, that I forget that I ever even was in Germany. It seems like it was such a long time ago, a different life, I guess. I came back home picked up my life right where I left off, meeting up with friends, watching Netflix movies with Tessa in my living room, driving to Costco to pick up a 5 lb bulk container of strawberries. Did it all really happen?

Right now, at 4 o'clock in the morning, I know it happened, mainly because the side effects of jet lag are still plaguing me. I do not think I have slept longer than 4 hours in one night. I keep waking up right around 3 thinking I have slept at least 8 hours, only to realize that the rest of Idaho is still asleep (or out partying), and it is in fact German time that I am on. I am really hoping this wears off soon, because I just feel so exhausted during the day. I apparently fell asleep for the entirety of "Dinner with Schmucks" last night. I do not think I have ever slept through an entire Steve Carrel movie.

While I was in Germany, my parents completely re-did my house: reupholstered furniture, new carpet, new hardwood flooring, different color schemes in my rooms. It was like I had come home to a completely new house, and I really liked it. It was almost like a fresh start. I think a lot of what I was both dreading and excited about was the fact that I was just going to come back here and pick my life up again, the good and the bad, the mundane and the exciting. This new house, this new perspective has made me realize that this really is a chance to start everything over here. Yes, I do expect that people will want me to act the same way (or not--I guess I was sort of a bitch before I left) but I really see this as an opportunity to sort of re-invent the wheel. I just spent a year living in Europe, for crying out loud! That has got to change something, yeah?

I was very concerned about how I was going to adjust coming back here, but I think everything is going to be fine. I miss my friends in Germany terribly, but I know that we will keep in touch. I have already skyped with Carrie and facebook chatted with a few others, and despite the fact that there is 6000 miles between all of us, I do not think any of these friendships will be hindered by this. I rest safe in this fact because, coming back here, my friends and I were able to pick back up right where we left off. It really does not feel like I was gone at all. I went to lunch with Vickie, Tessa and Melanie yesterday, and upon watching Vickie and I together, Melanie commented that it was amazing how easy it was for the two of us to interact with each other after such a long time apart. But it feels that way with everyone that I have seen so far. Distance does not necessarily have to be a bad thing; in fact, I think the saying goes: distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Not only that, I have my wonderful kitty back, who is sitting here on the couch next to me watching me type this blog. I was concerned because when we got back here, he hid under the bed for most of the day, but I think he remembers his home, and is relishing in the solitude of being the only cat in the house. Though he is going a little stir-crazy to get outside. I fear that the toys Jan sent with me from Germany will only capture his attention for so long before he turns his aggressive tendencies on my new furniture.

So now that I am no longer "an American living in Deutschland," I am not sure what the overarching theme of this blog will be. Probably just my random exploits, which are usually just as exciting. So I hope you all continue to read, because I will continue to post.

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